NOT THIS GUY

Every so often I check out the local paper from the county in which I blossomed until I up and left for a higher education.  It's very entertaining.  In fact I have posted the local police report on here before because you read about someone's change being stolen out of their car or a chainsaw that went missing.  Or even some "skids" that disappeared from the local tractor distributor.  Well, once again I sought and found cheap thrills from this paper.  On the front page was a picture of a kid.  Well, at first glance I thought "kid", nothing more.  Kinda creepy looking, with dark, sullen eyes like someone who doesn't sleep or smokes too much weed.  He had a smirk on his face like he's constantly got something up his sleeve and we'll never find out what it is.  It was this guy:

Not sure why the black box to his left, but whatever.  Anyway, I then see the caption.  His title, so to speak.  And as it turns out he is the new Youth and Family Minister at our local Lutheren Church.  I'm alarmed.  I don't know why.  But if you are being introduced, and especially if you are to make an impression on parents whose youths you will be ministering, wouldn't you want to clean it up a little.  Where was God when this picture was taken?  I already don't like the guy.  He looks smarmy.  Icky.  And he's only 20.  He's still a youth!  Oy.  Call me crazy.  Although I guess he has good charisma.  Then again, Hitler had a lot of that too and we all know that went over like a Led Zepplin.  However, maybe he'll rock and do great things for kids.  Maybe had he counseled or ministered the couple below, they wouldn't look like they got their engagement photo taken amidst flying forward on a sex swing?  Or like she's his mother pressing her teen aged son up against her breasts.  Like this:

What goes on in this town?